Thursday, December 31, 2015

Advent Prompts 4451-4475  

31 December 2015 - 22:35

4451 I am 7,000 feet up and this lake is twenty miles long
4452 A joy of grandchildren
4453 It's a bright, cheerful town
4454 Various ancestors
4455 I don't like the look of those birds

4456 A dull pain behind the ear
4457 By the side of the road on the way to Aberdare
4458 Sale Now On! SALE now on. Sale no ON!
4459 When he laughed you could smell salt
4460 NOW I'm tired

4461 A story about boys drowning
4462 GORSE
4463 That was what he did, day and night
4464 A caravan at Trecco Bay, Porthcawl
4465 I knew a bloke called Jones, tallish

4466 I have a clean apron on. Am I sexy?
4467 Fish swim through the attic
4468 Various men come here. They don't stay long 
4469 You have been gone 34 days
4470 Church? Why not?

4471 Consider the weight, the quality
4472 At a rough guess, this is dying
4473 How do you cope with the smell?
4474 Ok, then, off you toddle, Sunshine
4475 Why should I care about some far-dead stranger?

17 Stories --
33 Flashes --
16 Poems -- 
10 Articles --
27 Diary --
00 Subs --
00 Rejects --
00 Hits -- 
85,801 Words 

December (25 Days)
Advent Prompts 4426-4450 

31 December 2015 - 20:18

4426 We had to have the cat put down. Sad.
4427 Once, in a tea shop, she broke my heart
4428 Playing old vinyl, The Stones
4429 The standard Hollywood depravity
4430 The Mother of all queues

4431 Worms, undercover operatives. Slugs, terrorists
4432 It is impossible for me to live here.
4433 It's a long list, a lot of names
4434 He tastes nothing but his own bile
4435 The unicorn, quite rightly. said fuck this

4436 In the best stories, the baddie fights dirty, still loses
4437 He knew everything, but only from books
4438 I am resting between breakdowns
4439 He was imprisoned, I believe, something to do with a child
4440 We all sit close, pull the pin, pass it round

4441 Whoever is holding the grenade -- when -- dies
4442 The afternoon regulars, 19p cake, free hot drink
4443 He's a big man, he'll take it
4444 Since you left the rooms are smaller and more empty
4445 It's wood but not wood. Not plastic either

4446 She licked him to death
4447 I would like to fly, to sail beneath oceans, see the future
4448 Tomorrow is cancelled. sorry
4449 Do I have to keep talking?
4450 Lock me up. See if I care!
Advent Prompts 4401-4425

31 December 2015 - 10:00

4401 Come on Down, Girls!
4402 Time's elasticity varies in inverse proportion to need
4403 We had point signatures. elbow. wrist
4405 I am never sure what people mean by "stranger"

4406 Probably in KL or Singapore
4407 My mother's thimbles, needles, cotton, false-teeth
4408 genuine Faux
4409 There is something exquisite in a perfectly-ironed pillowcase
4410 But they are not US

4411 I was just passing through
4412 A B&B in Portmadoc or Harlech
4413 It was a conception in reception
4414 A shallow bath heavy Dettol yellow
4415 You could be my son. Would you like to?

4416  It is barely four, there is an odd buzzing of the light
4417  Cheese
4418 Maybe there is a man who'll lift you up
4419 Reading about Gurkhas
4420 If something started it'll have been in The Red Lion

4421 We can walk along backstreets expecting to be mugged
4422 My Lambretta Vega 76cc
4423 I suspect she knew all along
4424 Old barmaids, stooping. incredible beer
4425 Late, as more and more lights go out

Advent Prompts 4376-4400

31 December 2015 - 06:34

4376 I think I will go for a walk 
4377 Anyone would think I'd been away long
4378 I woke and the house was crying
4379 How do you like my mask?
4380 Filing halfpennies for the meter

4381 Just how fast did I get this fat?
4382 Two men waiting for a train
4383 Barefoot but immaculate
4384 It is unfortunate that you have seen my face
4385 You're shouting now. Please stop.

4386 Imagine pitching a tent on an iceberg, attaching an electric motor then visiting Africa
4387 It's the Vinyl Countdown
4388 Black Candle, Black Flame
4389 I have a dog who hates women dressed in green
4390 Come home. come back in, there's a kettle on

4391 Large print always makes me think of rip-off
4392 I shall invent tea
4393 The world might end tonight, but then doesn't it every night?
4394 You were always one for jumping out of things
4395 I bought my wife a pea-green suit

4396 One man says something ti another man
4397 I suppose I am bitter, but I am not malicious
4398 There's ANOTHER fucking year?
4399 Why woman smiles in her sleep. I do not know where she is
4400 Fuck Rudolph, bloody Commie
Advent Prompts 4351-4375

31 December 2015 - 04:20

4351 She fails to see Larry walking past the church
4352 Pereq was very handsome in his uniform
4354 Larry wakes at 03:50. takes a piss
4355 A meal, a beautiful white fish, but he is sad 

4356 Her under a street-light thumbing
4357 In the Blue Bung, they went this close
4358 Well, bugger me, I'm dead
4359 Tin Can
4360 His face have been full of worry

4361 My little three-wheeler
4362 When we all went out, picking blackberries
4363 Always one eye out through the class window
4364 I asked nurse if I could marry Maria
4365 I picked apples

4366 When a bullet goes by, it's like a buzz
4367 Particularly day, particularly cold
4368 When I was a little boy I had a small truck that carried bricks
4369 From the water the moon is half cloud-rubbed, half cliff-hidden
4370 It is an over-eagerness in him, not rudeness

4371 The moon above the island
4372 The woman was fat. Her can was pink
4353 Friday afternoon, very cold
4374 She steps from the train, waits for the crowd to swallow her up
4375 Happy as Larry

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Advent Prompts 4326-4350 

30 December 2015 - 20:20

4326 The leaves about our feet
4327 Carrying her luggage
4328 Harry Fucking Potter
4329 Old Vinyl
4330 We didn't meet at Paddington 

4331 A far better thing
4332 She has to work but she loves to polish
4333 I wouldn't say I was vicious
4334 I feel the nakedness of men abed
4335 This is a life I pretend to like

4336 A dirty bar close to the bridge
4337 Damn you Capulets!
4338 The Milk Train home
4339 Dreaming of dark trees swaying
4340 I once dated a dentist

4341 Welsh? Me? Non, Monsieur
4343 Earth has nothing to show more shitty
4344 The tribe will not fail to take revenge
4345 I do not rile easy Sir, but do not rile me

4346 I seek a house that looks so warm at night
4347 Just Kill it and go
4348 A photograph of his dead children
4349 We came from a little town where honour was the norm
4350 I would like a house on a crumbling cliff

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

Advent Prompts 4301-4325
29 December 2015 - 23:05

4301 The eyes of a rattler
4302 I have a few farthings
4303 I have lost weight lately and I tire easily
4304 Tomorrow might be possible 
4305 We bought a water bed and started to drift apart

4306 After sixty a man should not worry over trifles
4307 I told my dog about you
4308 Give me a bad haircut please
4309 My wife would like to have luncheon with you
4310 I am very, very tired. Tired enough to die

4311 So pleased to hear you are returning
4312 I'm doing an experiment
4313 The Zen of Washing-Up
4314 I shut the door
4315 I am in bed, outside it rains

4316 The lamps are being re-lit
4317 How it is in the valley
4318 I am waiting for the moment. It will come
4319 At Euston Station
4320 I got married when I was seventy-three

4321 The view when we open the French window
4322 Behave!
4323 I'm just a bloke in a dust-coat
4324 A man contemplates a wall
4325 Rise above it, float
Advent Prompts 4276-4300

29 December 2015 - 04:32

4276 At thee same time, that suggests you are perhaps obsessional
4277 and we believe long-distance running helps
4278 I am thinking of daffodils, and those little blues and purples and whites
4279 There is a stillness filling me up
4280 While we recognise it is the law

4281 While we appreciate the removal of your womb
4282 Perhaps a small curtain under your desk
4283 The people I knew, like tired sheep trudging home through fog
4284 and the necessity for a separate bathroom
4285 A tight bodice to eliminate any suggestion of a breast

4286 Please make my grave a circle with a roundabout beneath
4287 Could you change your name?
4288 It is possible, however, that you may disturb certain members of staff
4289 Consider, too the conversations at tea
4290 I apologise to whoever today's God is

4291 Your qualifications are undeniable
4292 The gentleman have a certain way, various habits
4293 The weightless perfection of a kiss
4294 We prefer, if possible, to minimise bodily functions
4295 and "undulations" too

4296 But if I'm asked did you get what you wanted from this life, I'll say no
4297 Chepstow, Raining
4298 I like the word "dolorous" but I won't use it in this poem
4299 Please fee; assured we will be writing again soon
4300 My new yellow wellies

Monday, December 28, 2015

Advent Prompts 4251-4275

28 December 2015 - 04:27

4251 Just me and my mother, walking to the shops
4252 I am thinking Tate & Lyle and Golden Spoon
4253 There was  song like that, very sad, and if you heard it it bounced around your head
4254 Six dollars and nineteen cents
4255 Tap shoes and hard fists

4256 This is the time of too many things
4257 My Father, My Uncle Tom
4258 Sputnik
4259 Not everyone has an elder sister
4260 If there are this many girls, the same of boys, and all inclined the same way

4261 Why would anyone make pasta?
4262 When they have italic explanations before line one
4263 We squeezed into a taxi and set off in hope
4264 Too many Ws for sure
4265 These are important things but too soon other important things overtake them

4266 Surely a God would ban floods at Xmas
4267 A disinterested God, and yet in summer there's less news?
4268 Make every bullet count, whites of their eyes
4269 The bar full of Belgian soldiers, wolves, bears
4270 Face it, this is a dirty rotten life

4271 It was World War Three
4272  I dream of head-scarved women working at oily looms
4273 Some of the daddies maybe, a few gay
4274 We have failed magnificently and that's enough
4275 I sing the song of a woman I have never met

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Advent Prompts 4201-4225 

27 December 2015 - 11:20

4201 I do not imagine tongues or light, but relations, that would be kind
4202 Where is the life, in the flower or the bulb?
4203 Perhaps we become great buildings
4204 We could try summoning birds, communing
4205 At the circus maybe, in the jaws of an angry lion

4206 Whatever, there are other forms, different times
4207 Treat each time we wake as a promise
4208 It is different from all the ways they said
4209 If suddenly I did not exist, as far as you knew
4210 It is important that you stay between the lines

4211 We will trick the nurses and slip away
4212 It is a kind of late winter, when you need to sleep a while
4213 I am not dead, I may not be dying, I'm probably not even sick
4214 This is the face of my family, a kidney, a little marrow
4215 Whose is this empty place?

4216 Slow horses, moving steadily
4217 Sleep son, sleep. It will be all right
4218 Fear to live instead!
4219 My great grandfathers sleep and their fathers. It is song
4220 Suns die and we are much smaller

4221 From the train so quickly naked to the showers, no ceremony
4222 And the water accumulates, I become larger
4223 is yours a hungry bear, a snake, or a vulture stealing bits of you as you rot
4224 Nothing is lost until we give up looking, and even then..
4225 You would have to say that death at the wrong time is a bitch
Advent Prompts 4176-4200

27 December 2015 - 08:00

4176 When she died and her parents insisted, I had to remind myself she was a white witch
4177 I am at stage 593 of grief
4178 had once danced naked under a Lundy Moon
4179 It is the softness of these dim drums, their gentleness
4180 Hey, Mr Spaceman!

4181 I leave a cow and my eternal hatred
4182 Do I think I can ever sit outside a sunstruck cafe again?No
4183 What is worse than losing a child? Seeing your child lose hers
4184 I hear pieces of laughter, all of the same. her cut up, upon a table, giggles rising
4185 Bad weather

4186 Pile the snow high after as much soft earth as you can find
4187 I would be a widow, but first there must be a husband
4188 We need relief, something jolly
4189 I am faithless but I like hymns and goldfish
4190 This is the difficult part, the sordid facts

4191 It is worse when it is sunny
4192 His was large, solid, open; a good soul
4193 No Dominion: Not gone there gentle.
4194 We die, of course. It is not the leaving but the being left
4195 They died in the same crash, I pray they did not know the other

4196 How does she fill the room with the screaming fact she is not here?
4107 We float, we fly. We are simply not bothered holding on ay more
4198 Nothing now, nothing ever will have a point
4199 Imagine he is in Butlins
4200 In the sky, great planes streaming smoke
Advent Prompts 4151-4175
26 December 2015 - 23:59

Boxing Day V

4151 When you've been alone a while longer...
4152 Chinese White
5153 Like lambs without the knife
4154 Big tits, sells oranges
4155 You have the right face for me, and heart

4156 The History of Lego
4157 Oh, no, it isn't!
4158 There is a cold field, and as the mist rises...
4159 Call it dead.
4160 The kids called it Aber Mountain

4161 I cannot stay awake
4162 The world cracked open, air rushing in
4163 Maggie tried to kiss me
4164 I'm late, but at least I'm here
4165 Try not to tell the truth

4166 Slugs, Slugs, Slugs, Salt
4167 It's like perpetual February
4168 A Big Yellow Bus
4169 Dad's Army
4170 I have never been here. I am not here now

4171 We must stay aware of winter
4172 We are almost done!
4173 I have fallen off
4174 We just couldn't help it -- we sang and sang
4175 Summer is too hot, Autumn dull

Saturday, December 26, 2015

Advent Prompts 4126-4150

26 December 2015 - 21:05

Boxing Day IV

4126 We drank tea together in Fearis's
4127 Catastrophe! Our President is dead.
4128 Ugly tables, ugly people, ugly food.
4129 Ah, this growing old.
4130 It is not a good day

4131 I am greatly troubled by certain dreams
4132 Not a good word spoken about anyone. Very funny
4133 A heavy cloud hangs over Europe
4134 I would like an extra egg
4135 Try to avoid complications, dear

4136 Thatcher has gone!
4137 His company has gone sky high, many debts
4138 They have run away together, to Anglesey of all places.
4139 This is not so and never can be.
4140 Nottingham. Horrible undergraduates

4141 A woman with a face like a dead squirrel
4142 People like different books at different times
4143 I am not convinced about kissing
4144 Several cold baths
4145 At night walking through Covent Garden

4146 My husband has become his mother
4147 A Pitiable Show
4148 With Colonel P, consumed a lot of port
4149 A pain which made him vomit twice over
4150 These are the sorts of things careless people say
Advent Prompts 4101-4125 
26 December 2015 - 13:55

Boxing Day III

4101 To bed early, with mistress
4102  Why is poetry so much an older man's comfort?
4103 Only solution defenestration
4104 Bombings, murders, physical assaults still continuing
4105 These sad little coastal towns on the North Sea

4106 The tension makes me physically ill
4107 All those women growing old
4108 I have touched jane Austen's desk
4109 High has been obliged to go to Nice for ten days
4110 Dined with the Johnsons at their villa in Naples

4111 Little doing -- long bath
4112 Elizabeth went off this morning to visit with Harold. I am in agony
4113 New Yorker rang. Did I have a story?
4114 She is about forty, with a cute but strained face
4115 Amazing caterpillars, brilliant blacks and yellows

4116 The Japs will sue for peace now
4117 An old admirer has died
4118 I would like to join the Irish Flea-Keepers Association
4119 A mix of elation and terror
4120 The papers are full of this doomsday bomb

4121 Oh, I have had such a miserable night.
4122 Long-haired brats with head lice
4123 A fat mother opposite with a horrible bawling baby
4124 A boy-child refusing to open his eyes
4125 JB had a headache, then a full-on, terrible brain haemorrhage 

Advent Prompts 4076-4100

26 December 2015 - 08:05

Boxing Day II

4076  Full fathom five (fucking deep)
4077 A man, naked, blue, his picture in a cave. I was here!
4078 I may have to return to New York
4079 Kick a Nazi in the trousers
4080 Frankly it was an exceedingly dull read

4081 He sees what other see but differently
4082 I have nothing of importance to say
4083 A land where they laugh
4084 A man called Sullivan, sells brushes and polish for to door
4085 I was the toast of Newport, Mon

4086 This little thing inside, tick, tick, tick
4087 November rain is different. It wants you.
4088 The I gave my lecture
4089 Extremely funny postcard sent!
4090 Throw me a child

4091 The Football Pools, BFPO 19, Breast of Lamb
4092 These fat, ugly, ugly feet
4093 Just before Christmas, bronchitis, not good
4094 My wife in another room, the long long insult
4095 Sweating for the last number

4096 The Welsh? They have poets but Jesus, all that coal and gloom!
4097 So what if we go that way instead?
4098 Martin Fucking Amis
4099 At least I don't come from Cardiff
4100 I'm planning to read War & Peace, a page a day

Number of People Given Emergency Food
From Trussel Trust Foodbanks

2005-06 2,814 Labour
2006-07 9,174 Labour
2007-08 13,849 Labour
2008-09 25,899 Labour
2009-10 40,898 Labour

2010-11   61,468 Conservative
2011-12 128,697 Conservative

2012-13 346,992 Conservative
Advent Prompts 4051-4075

26 December 2015 - 06:11

Boxing Day

4051 So O'Keefe leans in and says 
4052 We've never really been close
4053 You are not you without your glasses
4054 You cannot paint a moving river
4055 I shall refer to myself in the third person. There is a third person in this marriage.

4056 I am pissing blood
4057 Your three letters are now to hand
4058 Pomegranate green tea, a street-cleaning machine outside
4059 I caught a fish made of stone
4060 Message to my grandson

4061 The man runs a dismal painted-furniture shop
4062 I have no problem with who he loves, only the manner
4063 We have brought you up on iPads. You try to swipe pages
4064 The Zulu is a fiendish fighter
4065 People with cancer are selfish, mostly

4066 The red Coat, I suppose, and the Martin Henry, and that long bayonet
4067 I feel I might write more if I left the bank
4068 The biggest boil on my arse
4069 So this, this is poetry
4070I feel the need to say something learned and profound

4071 I am afraid you may have become anxious. So sorry
4072 This be fucked
4073 Dad, I said, don't die while they're still playing
4074 Can you be tempted up to town this evening?
4075 Orbison was a strange looking fellah

Friday, December 25, 2015

I have been summoned

I have to rejoin the human race
Advent Prompts 4026-4050

25 December 2015 - 09:10

Christmas Day II

4026 It is lovely here, quiet, green, heavy with light
4027 Something about a chap called Prufrock
4028 All of the crew are drowned
4029 I will try my best to do something for the wretch
4030 A chevy at ninety then upside down

4031 I can only cite my own case to show that all things are possible
4032 A long knife in her leather belt
4033 Acquaintances made at Oxford will help
4034 Six swans with guns
4035 Various friends have plugged away at law, medicine, prostitution

4036 We went to see the dentist this afternoon
4037 Pardon this detail
4038 It is 9:09 on the 9th of the 9th
4039 I wrote to mother yesterday. She is still suffering with her nerves
4040 I need a head and neck massage from a Turk with fingers like bullets

4041 There is a Torpedo Boat in the harbour
4042 Has someone trumped?
4043 He lacks tact, I would say
4044 Confined spaces are deadly to certain dispositions 
4045 This last month I have been busier than most men are in a lifetime

4046 He hides his grin behind a smile
4047 The battle will still go on
4048 And so it goes, and so it goes
4049 He majored in deflowering virgins, I believe 
4050 Nevertheless
Advent Prompts 4001-4025

25 December 2015 - 07:00

Christmas Day

4001 You must hear the rhythms first, and then if you really must, add words
4002 FUCK The Grouch and the damn Cafe Royal
4003 It is very cool here
4004 Coopers, Fletchers, resting whores
4005 I have broken my microscope and damaged my tray of butterflies

4006 Actually I do not care what your Christmas will be like
4007 Charlotte found an empty birds-nest
4008 Poppycock, Darling
4009 I do not know if in my last note I was sufficiently explicit
4010 Some murderers are innocent

4011 It is a fairly technical philosophical idea. I will not bore you.
4012 Throw in a little Anglo-Saxon
4013 Would it be possibly to visit with you and confer on the matter?
4014 Call a Spade a digging implement
4015 Occasional in-your-face remarks

4016 Maman, where is Cricklewood?
4017 BALLS!
4018 I have just heard from your secretary that you are out of town
4019 MI7
4020 Sir, I do not participate in sports. We have nothing to discuss

4021 Alcock & Brown
4022 I have been furnished with a delightful, rock-solid steamer-trunk
4023 Paris Underpasses, suitcases, wardrobes
4024 As soon as I have perfected arrangements with you, I will close matters with Cambridge
4025 And who do you suppose stears all this?

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Advent Prompts 3976-4000

24 December 2015 - 21:30

Our 4,000th Prompt of the Year!

3976 Forgive me, Father, for I am going to sin.
3977 I want a fat red biplane, spraying mists of oil
3978 Perhaps some merriment?
3979 I may need to rest half-way
3980 My Xmas Jumper

3981 We will suffer, we will survive a while, and then we will die
3982 She paints divinely, with transparent colourless paint
3983 The cat is in the microwave
3984 Throwing snowballs at the moon
3985 The captain suggests a quick death here. I prefer to procrastinate

3986 I woke, bloody, in a ditch
3987 You know Crocodile Dundee? I'm Hamster Jones
3988 My father paid the ransom, my wife outbid him.
3989 I Accuse Henderson!
3990 Please remove my skin

3991 I suggest you lock the door, have one stiff whisky, then slit your wrists
3992 Bit of a bitch that volcano in Leeds
3993 It is working men together that I miss, the going home to wives
3994 I am considering a book
3995 We make love only on days ending y

3996 There is something wrong with my phone
3997 And NOW, Ladies and Gentlemen...
3998 I have cashed the birthday cheque, raided the piggy, scrabble down the backs of chair
3999 No houses, too many dead, but they have perfect 4G
4000 And then that plague of frogs in Leominster

Advent Prompts 3951-3975

24 December 2015 - 09:44

3951 If the sky was like the sea and yet we breathed below it
3952 I would like a striped coffin, a false dick sticking through
3953 A day too soon, a minute to late, a bridge too far
3954 You smelt of smoke and something else
3955 Madame, I detest poor punctuality

3956 The clocks are stopped but the seconds tick on on iPhones
3957 Steep roads, the better when we return
3958 They are teaching the prisoners violin
3959 On my knees, red polish under my nails
3960 Pick me, from a hundred thousand and one

3961 I am going to stop milking cows and marry a man from the city
3962 Budgerigar Wharf? Why does that sound ridiculous?
3963 The women come, the women go, and it is never light
3964 Very well, we will call it even.
3965 I would like to repair old things, and then myself

3966 That is what piss-poor means
3967 With his marmalade under his hat
3968 Every policeman is a helmet.
3969 Dog shit to make my lady's leather so.
3970 Blocking out the sun

3971 It is difficult to live in Sarajevo
3972 For the show-and-tell this week we all made bombs.
3973 I would like a new hammock and a good strong knife
3974 We think Ahmed's father helped. It is not fair if that's his job
3975 I am opening up a marshmallow mine in Peru
Advent Prompts 3926-3950 

24 December 2015 - 04:44

Christmas Eve

3926 His horses confused, gazing at their shit
3927 Why don't we run away together and be a hermit?
3928 Amis bored me shitless.
3929 No one quite knew what to make of it
3930 I fell in love with the daughter of a butcher

3931 The neurotic rooftop crying, "It's Slate, It's Slate, It's Slate!"
3932 That nice one where everyone thinks he's waving, "Look at me!"
3933 It may be amazing, but first you have to drown
3934  I went back to my father rutting, stopped all this
3935 It has been a perfectly ordinary day at the office (apart from that)

3936 The children love too play on the pylons. Freedom to explore is a right
3937 You have killed the wrong Jones
3938 He collapsed against some well, expired unceremoniously
3939 She is dead in that puddle, water lapping in and out her nostril
3940 Fire, acid, poison, and those who survive have a healthy disposition

3941 Aliens landed in Brussels, departed
3942 My great-grandfather, his throat cut in the kitchen, missing where he was from
3943 You'll go wrong on the way, but arrive nevertheless
3944 They will hang me. Their sons and their daughters will pray for me.
3945 Some men beat up the sweet-shop owner

3946 The sea children are back, singing in the square
3947 Two months, give or take the deaths of half of you
3948 They should film our operations, for us to watch in recovery
3949 Beautiful aircraft, staring with sky
3950 Don't go out, child, though I am paralysed

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

 Advent Prompts 3926-3950 

 23 December 2015 - 18:45

3926 Meeting you made my dreams pathetic
3927 I am taking my wife to Oxford for a short holiday
3928 Bloody people KEEP telephoning
3929 Everyone was terribly square
3930 I'm sorry to pester you

3931 Bloody awful old life isn't it?
3932 I would reply differently if I were a different sort of chap
3933 You exhaust me but please don't change
3934 Delighted to hear you sounding so jolly
3935 Do they know the cause yet?

3936 Dearest Pigeon. Now THAT was a sparky day!
3937 We haven't spoken since you buggered off
3938 I have a new typewriter, absolutely spiffing
3939 The biggest tits I've ever seen on the hoof
3940 Are we still on for the 17th?

3941 Those French-speaking fuckers!
3942 And a happy 1964 to you, Sir!
3943 I had left Swansea by then, so was unreachable
3944 I hereby resign
3945 I can assure you I am not "playing hard to get"

3946 We strained every nerve to get to see you, but the damn car!
3947 You were very understanding about "the business"
3948 I have done a little thinking 
3949 Weather marvellous, company excellent
3950 First chance I've had since it happened

More Prompts

Sometimes I wonder about the inside of my head...

Advent Prompts 3901-3925

23 December 2015 - 07:45

3901 This needs to be a good one
3902 I was drunk last month, drunker in October
3903 You took the best bit of me and threw it out
3904 I never had a cuddly bear, just soldiers made of tin
3905 The common, two labradors, cruise missiles, USAF, the women

3906 Gravity is a con. You just have to want to float and then believe
3907 Imagine paying tax. No, really, just for a minute
3908 Like you fell in this fresh grave, midnight, walking home. The sides are wet
3909 I have filthy nocturnal habits but I shower in the morning
3910 A man, having finished his coffee, has started screaming

3911 This incredible moment
3912 I will build a church upon a frozen lake and we will pray to keep it cold
3913 Why, exactly, does snoring disgust us?
3914 I put out a sign, Jehovah's Witnesses Welcome
3915 Trying to dry myself

3916 I am hoping to reach Tuesday for then the lights come back on
3917  I read once, this story about the sky coming down a little more every day until
3918 I have fallen in love with a fish
3919 Shoes, sandals, boots
3920 A terrible tragedy, only the children saved

2921 This is forbidden, that is forbidden, you are forbidden
3922 The land that is only land at low water, what does it think?
3923 I would rather absorb than be absorbed, but it is close
3924 This is an emergency, please send a poet.
3925 I wish I could just mend boats, somewhere where the sun is always kind

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Advent Prompts 3876-3900 

22 December 2015 - 20:15

3876 Where you are is important, what you are is vital
3877 Ten years ago this week my father went headfirst into that river
3878 I remember him now. He was the one with the scar
3879 I found an old Argus, the headline wasn't pretty
3880 And the soil in my hands is bloody

3881 Read the script. In the end you die
3882 We have him on a poetry drip, staring with milk Haikus
3883 A perfect lawn
3884 Sometimes I think I've caught the rhythm, but then it shifts
3885 She actually liked Marmite

3886 We can make an accommodation
3887 I am not renowned for my sense of direction
3888 Lozenge
3889 Your hand in mine; but then I throw it in the river
3890 Basically I'm raw material. Use me.

3891 A town full of green men
3892 My name is Alice Springs (unfortunately)
3893 I owe too much money to the wrong men
3894 She looked a million dollars and was only fifteen
3895 We could meet in my father's shed, have sex on the fertiliser 

3896 That's the thing about candles
3897 Coracle
3898 My name is Benjamin Pope, recently deceased
3899  I will get there eventually
3900 Just bluster, wait for the cavalry

Advent Prompts 3851-3875 

21 December 2015 - 21:56

3851 Do you bite your thumb at me, Sir?
3852 Is it because I'm Irish?
3853 His stronger foot, his weaker arm
3854 A husband beats a wife
3855 Quoting Jay Gatsby

3856 'S' called inter-fucking-course
3857 Hope, the seed of insanity or inhumanity
3858 There was a young man called Hunt; who most of the time was a decent bloke
3860 Nothing sharper, more aroused than the man before his death

3861 The forensic analysis of loneliness
3862 Talk to me of war after you have seen a dead man
3863 The Martian
3864 A Small Lie
3865 To be beautiful and a fool

3866 The fundamental theories of human statistics
3867 They build you up, your mother, your father
3868 Losing 1-0 away, ten minutes to go
3869 The neon beauty of The Emirates
3870 Ish Cwishmas

3871 The precise definition of bravery
3872 OOPS!!
3873 Fuck this for a bunch of soldiers
3874 Just say something that nobody will understand
3875 My daughter doesn't quite get the point...

Advent Prompts 3826-3850

22 December 2015 - 10:15

3826 How dark the world becomes when silent
3827 Can we discuss your deformity?
3828 Now that is a quite marvellous interjection, Sir!
3829 It is quite possible to live without a heart
3830 And all the bells and whistles dear, don't forget

3831 Seventy-Five Trombones
3832 The other side is shadow. This side is dark
3833 Uncaring, unknowing, blind
3834 I reckon, in this old life, I've had four gardens, maybe five
3835 The circumstances we are in might be called difficult

3836 I did that. Look, it's almost level
3837 A sprout has escaped
3838 My father sang Volare, my mother never sang
3839 Pinafore 
3840 The Devil's off-duty and we are out on the piss

3841 I wish I'd had a name like Alistair Wellbegood
3842 Twelve very long months
3843 Cordwainer, Higgler, Executioner's Assistant
3844 Letter.
3845 Before the day is over, something bad will come

3846 When I was ten, I fell in thorns
3847 I would quite like martyrdom, to be a note in Wiki 
3848 Draw the curtains, be quiet
3849 It was cold so we set fire to the headmaster
3850 We are wrapped up, walking towards the summit

Target Demolished!

I am very pleased to say, at 08:21 this morning 

I have SMASHED the 50,000 words target.

Started 7th December 05:25

That's 15 days and three hours, 

50,626 Words
Advent Prompts 3801-3825

22 December 2015 - 06:35

3801 And, when you think of it, it's in black and white
3802  We called it a mountain but it was slag, high over the school
3803 "Starless and bible-black"
3804 It is a filthy, dirty business and there i evil in every owner's heart
3805 Crabtree Cottage

3806 But then I think: To begin at the beginning
3807 Pat adjusts his shoulder straps
3808 and we are blind too, not moles, not dead captains
3809 We slave for beer-money, by the wife a dress
3810 No, not really, my grandad was from Somerset

3811 131, The Celyn (these are huts)
3812 England, Wales and Monmouthshire
3813 Evans caught it while taking a shit
3814 Our exercise books has a map on the back
3815 Was a time when coal ruled the waves

3816 Newport, Cardiff, and other large places
3817 I think of you, of course, but I'm usually half-drunk and it's raining
3818 Sorry, I didn't mean to. Run it under a tap
3819 I seem to be getting a bit Welsh. I need to stop forthwith and apologise
3820 Tony Martin scratched his leg

3821 I am going to build a library in Cwmbran and fill it with poetry
3822 Out from the pits to be mown down in France
3823 The only Welsh poet I know is English and lives in Scotland
3824 I went to Mynndyslwyn but it had gone
3825 I might as well stop now

Monday, December 21, 2015

Advent Prompts 3801-3825 -

21 December 2015 - 21:56

3801 Do you bite your thumb at me, Sir?
3802 Is it because I'm Irish?
3803 His stronger foot, his weaker arm
3804 A husband beats a wife
3805 Quoting Jay Gatsby

3806 'S' called inter-fuckinng-course
3807 Hope, the seed of insanity or inhumanity
3808 There was a young man called Hunt; who most of the time was a decent bloke
3810 Nothing sharper, more aroused than the man before his death

3811 The forensic analysis of loneliness
3812 Talk to me of war after you have seen a dead man
3813 The Martian
3814 A Small Lie
3815 To be beautiful and a fool

3816 The fundamental theories of human statistics
3817 They build you up, your mother, your father
3818 Losing 1-0 away, ten minutes to go
3819  The neon beauty of The Emirates
3820 Ish Cwishmas

3821 The precise definition of bravery
3822 OOPS!!
3823 Fuck this for a bunch of soldiers
3824 Just say something that nobody will understand
3825 My daughter doesn't quite get the point...

Advent Prompts 3776-3800
21 December 2015 - 14:45

3776 In the clouds, suddenly, but near to God
3777 I am from silt and made of silt. I cannot drown
3778 The coast a faintly more solid blue, clouds black and low
3779 We're done here. Right, who's next?
3780 We start again tomorrow. If that doesn't work we start again the next day.

3781 Listen, that is Hell. Hear my wife bickering.
3782 Slip me a fag, Nigel, and I will love you forever
3783 Halle-fucking-lujah!
3784 As cars pass, and lorries pass, and finally, a big red bus
3785 If you can't be nice, try travel

3786 It wasn't me, Miss!
3787 At a guess I'm two weeks old
3788 A character black is ever a character black.
3789 Is every flower better uncut?
3790 Seven o'clock, minimum wage, walking home to save the bus-fare

3791 I am here to bury Lazarus
3792 Not oozing juice or tall enough to salute 
3793 I am burning ice. I am a talking tree
3794 It is not January 12th
3795 I am not talking to my mistress

3796 Almost clever bon mots, almost decent wine
3797 Born by a wrong star, the moon at its ugliest
3798 Head, shoulder, lay. Now!
3799 Who speaks for me?
3800 I am an accident of my birth


05:30 7th December

Time now

 09:38 21st December

Time available

13 Days 2 Hours 8 minutes (Day 14 just started)

24 Flashes
07 Stories
07 Poems
03 Articles
05 Videos

47,188 Words. Daily Average 3,394 Words

Repeated for 365 Days = 1, 238, 810 words a year
Advent Prompts 3751-3775

21 December 2015 - 09:30

3751 The street fills for midnight, decays quickly after one.
3752 This state of mind, mine, displeases me
3753 There is something quite splendid in a friend mortified
3754 You leave me undone
3755 I am a little bored. Would you care to fornicate?

3756 There is something vaguely sexy about your double standards
3757 "Oh would I might wander" or something
3758 After the first shock, there comes a recognition, a kind of re-assessment
3759 I am red-blooded; you are all white-cells, choking
3760 You walked here; I can feel it

3761 That's the thing about sexual intercourse: it can't be done dry
3762 The female poet doesn't Sitwell with me
3763 Somehow he stares from every painting
3764 Yes, it's still fucking raining. No, we are not there yet!
3765 Once brown men here, barefoot but with the planet in their hearts

3766 Vote? Lie down in the shit if it pleases you.
3767 Listen, have a party, but then it's OK to forget me.
3768 I'm sixteen, wanting to buy her a locket
3769 The more superior person books an appointment, stays not a second too long
3770 The sweating garbage puked out from distant countries

3771 Goes by initials, very secretive
3772 An incident is being reported in Rhyl, North Wales
3773 Your writing is hard to decipher
3774 If swans were black and ugly
3775 Picasso has had an accident. Details sketchy.

Sunday, December 20, 2015

Advent Prompts 3701-3725 

20 December 2015 - 18:20

3701 When Mail Trains clacked across the night
3702 I am bloody, I am bowed, but I am not yet beaten
3703 The dogs are used to it
3704 She was a famous ventriloquist, a nun with a nymphomaniac dummy
3705 You have made an end of it

3706 I remember the face of my father
3707 Cruellest weeks are not in April
3708 A drip, an ocean, a grain of salt, the world
3709 As we walked back home from the mine
3710 No longer the roar of the falls, a stream near home

3711 Six lads, only one machine-gun
3712 We bought eight Blackjacks and then Isobel kissed me
3713 Gone away, to silence, peace
3714 And the moment, fourteen, racing to the tape
3715 She's taller, I'm the Lower Watha

3716 The way hard, the mud crying, the rain vindictive
3717 He remembers the college, soft grass, shadows
3718 Just think of it as a transfer to Hartlepool Reserves
3719 The boat leaked and they hadn't set out yet
3720 A tall white ship, the sun by day, at night the North Star

3721 What did the Romans ever give us?
3722 From where he lay, something rose up 
3723 Our favourite painters, bits of music
3724 She is like a perfect pizza, pepperoni
3725 Like a perfect summer day, the lightest breeze, like a kiss

Friday, December 18, 2015

Advent Prompts 3676-3700 

18 December 2015 - 21:30

3676 I would not mind it if the evening was a little cooler
3677 We are going on a long journey
3678 My desire for women disturbs me
3679 Good night's sleep. Feeling far more chipper!
3680 Spent the morning forging papers.

3681 The newsboys are saying The Titanic is sunk!
3682 Burden Park, Ibrox, Hillsboro
3683 Limp sandwiches, Coca-Cola
3684 Some sort of siege at the Spaghetti House
3685 Many South Vietnamese drowned

3686 Virginia: coffee at The British Library
3687 The great tragedy of the South
3688 The Fuhrer is a great admirer of the Greeks
3689 Dreadful news from Paris
3690 The negro problem

3691 I have a private audience with the Pope. Me and 5,000 others
3692 No writing this year. I am readying myself.
3693 I came home to a wife dressed in black, surprised to see me
3694 It seems I always arrive just as the train has left
3695 A tiny, doll-like girl, a face far too white

3696 My father, a corporal, three airmen, a yellow bulldozer
3697 He had volunteered but he was black.
3698 My head pounding, I am older
3699 Behind all those bobbing, docile faces
3700 Fear is the basis of love
Advent Prompts 3651-3675 - 

18 December 2015 - 00:30

3651 My jacket stole, only a button on the floor
3652 He had eyes like frosted glass in a cheap toilet
3653 The censor had blacked out ever word except "cock"
3654 Burke hanged this morning
3655 I have finished painting and I need to recuperate

3656 People are far too optimistic
3657 So I'm in The Hard Rock between fat agents and big-totted starlets
3658 I am not in the best of tempers, Sir, I warn you!
3659 Nothing happened to day. Nothing. In diary wrote, "Nothing Happened today."
3660 I really we feel we ought to kill someone.Let them know we are serious

3661 One dead, four saved, three more missing, presumed drowned
3662 Thank you for your note which I read carefully, but I see no reason to apologise
3664 It seems the king is smitten by an American whore
3665 These are the SIXTIES, Darling!

3666 You will have received my wire by now
3667 He was something of an athlete, and self-centred
3668 I heard she fucked a bobby in an alleyway in Kew
3669 Very Glum!
3670 The faux friendships of Americans

3671 I have been considering what might be done
3672 Balderdash, Sir! Absolute Piffle!
3673 She spends her days sweating as Minnie Mouse for ugly children
3674 Really, I ought to be in bed, preferably accompanied
3675 I am guilty. I must be guilty of SOMETHING

Thursday, December 17, 2015

Advent Prompts 3626-3650 

17 December 2015 - 11:45

3626 It is my 41st birthday but I'm lying about my age
3627 The Welshman, the Drunk: Whatsisname
3628 We hope to meet the Maharajah
3629 The fifty-two fallen children of this parish
3630 Mumsy, there is a strong smell of poo here

3631 Watching her dance, even while naked, inspires little sexual arousal
3633 Have you eaten?
3634 Wednesday: Zoo
3635 We drove into the country looking for a good butcher

3636 Read two books on sexual abnormalities: Good.
3637 We kissed in a cab as we left The Savoy
3638 It depends a good deal on one's education
3639 Colder then ever
3640 She rejected me somberley and without the slightest ambivalence

3641 Your spectacles and wallet are in the fire
3642 Pink and Fizzy Please
3643 The cook is called Bertha and she is very fat
3644 We stopped between Jacksonville and Mississippi 
3645 Every day, as I awake, my first thought is, "Why am I here?"

3646 The housewives of Baltimore need us
3647 He has a huge Newfoundland, and a raven. They are in love
3648 Ten eggs for two reels of cotton, pound of ham for a little wool
3649 They are draining the pus this afternoon
3650 Everything I look at reminds me of you.
Advent Prompts 3601-3625 

17 December 2015 - 07:30

3601 Am I right in thinking that your father married my mother?
3602 Says I to me, George this is a bad do.
3603 Prince Charming no longer charms us
3604 We took tea in a frantic café resplendent with busted dowagers
3605 An excellent afternoon. Four guns, seven hundred rabbits

3606 Walked back to the commons in the rain
3607 I have turned down a handsome offer to play opposite Lemmon
3608 For a day, only a day, I would like to be a servant.
3609 Perhaps I was becoming a little smug
3610 Tried to write about art. No good

3611 A jangle of starlings
3612 No lights bright enough to breach the fog. Drums on the shore
3613 Dusk echoing with the tramp of boots
3614 The character of John Bull.
3615 There is a man upstairs in bed with my wife. You must all leave forthwith.

3616 I was a secretary there, but only briefly
3617 They take their sex lives seriously
3618 I will spend evenings before the mirror asking how I am
3619 We took a Greyhound to anywhere
3620 A voice that frightened pigeon

3621 Ireland is perfect, except it is Catholic
3622 Just Fuck Off, December!
3623 Subjected to some abuse. They called out Yid and Yad, but no windows broken
3624 Have just got back from analysis. I am clearly barking
3625 I felt it was time to go home and speak to my wife

Wednesday, December 16, 2015

 Advent Prompts 3576-3600 

 16 December 2015 - 23:00

3576 We have found ourselves in a hut, sleeping in bunks
3577 He is  a most cunning rogue
3578 She is Hobson's widow and relentless
3579 We discussed various matters of aviation and the fact his daughter was a whore
3580 She is particularly ugly, but efficient

3581 I am the financial edge.
3582 Girls are problems, simple!
3583 There is nothing more sickening than living of the heroism of others
3584 Nervous, agitated, with the movements of a stick-insect
3585 The death sentences have excited the villagers

3586 My grandson watching Star Wars 99
3587 I am concerned with the plight of the men
3588 I am up to here with frivolity
3589 A slightly better prostitute accosted me
3590 Only solution the window

3591 The best gentlemen have left town
3592 My mare bolted, caught by two Billingsgate boys
3593 The salt baths were dirty with occasional pubic hairs
3594 After dinner, we set off for the beach
3595 Her family thinks she is a button-girl in Woolworths

3596 The theft of a butter tub: Guilty
3597 I believed I may have touched a tender spot
3598 We met soon after prayers
3599 Nobodies should be despised
3600 There was no First World War for Kafka

Going Well

The purpose of The Advent Flash, was, obviously, to get Boot Camp writing.

There's a problem for the writing soul when holidays come round and when "I'll Go From There" dates loom in the calendar.

What could be more natural than to think, on December 1st, ""Starting New Year's day I'm going to really hammer. I'm going to get up at silly o'clock and write XXX a day."


But even if you DO manage this and your pronouncements are not self-delusion, what about December?

I know from jaded experience that output from Boot Camp drops away in the holiday month.


We are either writers or we are not. 

A writer is someone who wakes every day, EVERY day, and first-off thinks, "How will I find the time to write today?"

Every blank day is a day nearer your death.
Every blank day is a day nearer your death.
Every blank day is a day nearer your death.

You do not get blank days back.

In days-past Boot Camp "Started the New Year" on Boxing Day, December 26th and I stressed to every Boot Camp Member, that they should THROW THEMSELVES at their work. 

They should hammer hammer hammer and go for big numbers on the 26-27-28-29-30-31, six days of December.

Easily, EASILY they could write 12,000 words or more in those six days, then, on January 1st when they get out of bed, maybe hungover, maybe not, they would have 12,000 words in the New Year's Bank.

But, ATM, Boot Camp is under-populated, and such under-population tends to make the place work in fits and starts.

IMO the minimum number of members is about 16. That way, if half the number are seriously active that week we have eight people producing stories, the anonymity level shoots up, there is more variety of style, and a far better buzz.

But with Christmas approaching there was a danger that everyone would back-slide (November was fallow) and then, come January we would need to loosen stiff joints and get back into good habits.

That would effectively mean a month (December) lost, and then a week of the New Year.

Consider that for a second. You have lost 10% of your annual possibility. TEN PER CENT!

You are STARTING where, no matter what, you are working of a 90% maximum. That is CRAZY

Or, you can "Blast" in December and actually produce 2-3-4 times the average, GAINING percentage points.

So in BC we started the Advent-January Blast.

The idea was to over-produce in December in the 24/25 days to Christmas, build up a healthy bank of work, then, take Christmas day off, hopefully do SOMETHING on the 26th, then go full-on at it again on the 27th.

It is really dumb to procrastinate. DUMB DUMB DUMB.

For personal reasons, and health reasons, though I was posting 25 Flash Prompts every day (often more) I wasn't writing at the start of December. I just couldn't get going.

So, kicking my own arse, I set the alarm for 05:25 on the 7th December, got up, generated some prompts, and wrote a flash.

That flash, easily publishable, a good shot at a prize (125-135 in BC terms) was entered on the spreadsheet at 07:45

By the end of the day (not even the end) I had written FIVE flashes and a total of 2,890 Words

Now we are on Day 10 (sorry, I am on Day 10 playing catch-up). If this blog entry counts (and I don't count prompt-lists) then I am on piece No 38 and 32,003 words. 

By 07:00, while the guests are still all abed, I will pass 37,000 words for December. In my case that is 32,003 words in 10 Days, 3,200 words a day.

Five Stories, 17 Flashes,  six poems, a few articles.

If we had not had the two-stage Advent-January Blast I seriously doubt I would have written a word. And I will bet you now, that this dramatic push, this “over-production” will produce 28/28 publications (if I ever get round to subbing, which is a separate story) and there are AT LEAST four prize-winners in there.

You may not see these results for six months, such is the way of the world, but my publication/prize targets for 2016 HAVE ALREADY BEEN ACHIEVED, that is by 06:45 on December 16th, 2015. I merely have to send the stuff out.